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Welcome to the Infinite Cat Store, a vast repository of all types of cat-related schwag. If you're specifically looking for overpriced, ICP-festooned whatachamacallits, then please visit our Cafe Press location (first link, one row down). Otherwise all the goodies below come directly from amazon.com so, in that regard, you're on your own, suckers!

Doggy Poo
Because I can't afford a warehouse on Long Island filled with ICP crapola you'll have to visit our Cafe Press location and pay their obnoxious prices.

Click here if you're rich or stupid.
Cats Don't Dance DVD
"Cats Don't Dance" is a dandy animated feature that sadly got the stinky end of the studio politics stick. No question, end of story, my favorite cat movie of all time.

Click here to see what I mean.
Alf that loveable alien from Melmac
This unforgettable sitcom proved that even aliens from Melmac like cats, too....for dinner. But in a good way.

Click here if you love Alf.
The Nine ton Cat
What do you call a book detailing all that goes on in the back rooms of the National Gallery of Art?

Why, "The Nine Ton Cat", natch!

Click here to weigh your options.
Cat scratching post
Every cat needs a great, big, carpeted, fake version of itself to sharpen its claws on, right?

Right?

Click here or the terrorists win.
Why do Cats Do  That book
Finally, the answer to all those nagging questions like "Why does my cat keep bringing me dead animals?" in handy book format.

Click here to understand.
Remote-controlled mouse
A remote-controlled mouse to drive your cat bonkers. Just, uh, be sure and keep it safely stored away between play periods.

Click here to get moving.
Hiss and Tell
"Hiss and Tell: True Stories from the Files of a Cat Shrink".

One of my favorite cat book titles of all time.

Click here for the juicy details.
Ren & Stimpy
"You eediot! Rush out now and buy this 32-episode DVD set of Ren & Stimpy's first two seasons. And don't forget the hairy chest wig!"

Click here for joy-joy-joy!
Doggy Poo
"Heeeeeere, birdie, birdie, birdie, birdie."

Click here if you like squab.
Fritz the Cat DVD
X-rated....cat...cartoons.

The 70s was a very different place, man.

Click here for animated boobies.
Cat Ballou dvd
"Cat Ballou". Without doubt, the funniest movie ever set in Wolf City, Wyoming.

Click here for more details, pardner.
Mause
Yes, "Maus, A Survivor's Tale" may have allegorically portrayed cats as German Nazi's, but cut it some slack as the book won a frickin' Pulitzer Prize.

Click here for the grisly details.
Pooped cat
This item is simply called "Cat Too Pooped to Participate Cat Throw Blanket Afghan by Charles Wysocki". Couldn't have said it better myself.

Click here for more poop.
Cat Shower Hooks
The next time you're attacked in the shower by a sadistic killer maniac, you'll be comforted by these adorable cat-shaped shower curtain hooks.

Click here to hook up.
Cat Carrier
The great thing about America is that you can combine a cat-carrier, with a baby-stroller and people won't lock you away in the home for the commercially befuddled.

Click here to get rolling.
Cat Whirlagig
Rock-and-roll, hoochie-poo!

Click here for a mad whirl.
Cat casting
You're looking at 6 pounds of cast stone with everything that doesn't look like a cute kitty and his little mouse friend cut away.

Click here to rock and not roll.
Cat Kitchen Timer
My mother once had a kitchen timer in the shape of Dwight Eisenhower's head. This one offers some improvement.

Click here for a good time.
These are the cats you'll be happy to see in your Xmas tree.

Click here for some sack time.
This is why the terrorist's hate us. Because WE have leopard-skin bowling balls and they have sand. Lots and lots of sand.

Click here and have a ball.
Even though you never even knew they existed until now, you've probably always wanted a poof chair in a tacky faux-leopard print.

Click here, Paris.
Panther Accordion
Oh, to heck with disco. Let's POLKA! And the mazurka never sounded better than when played on a Hohner 3100 Panther diatonic accordion. Whatever that means.

Click here for your main squeeze.
Panther Stadium
Funny...Panther Stadium looks so much... bigger on TV.

Click here for a closer view.
Lady and the tramp siamese framed print
We are a framed-movie print, if you please. We are a framed movie print, if you don't, please.

Click here, Lady.
Frontline Flea Treatment
Short of laminating your cat in plastic, Frontline is the best flea-prevention treatment I've found.

Click here to croak a copepod.
Gay Purree DVD
My 2nd favorite cat movie! Great tunes, the unforgettable voice of Judy Garland, that peculiar UA animation style, and a surprise lesson in modern art. Tres bon!

Click here , s'il vous plait.
Kurt Vonnegut Cat's Cradle book
"Breakfast of Champions" is my very favorite Kurt Vonnegut book, but "Cat's Cradle" is still pretty danged good.

Click here. And so it goes.
Jeweled Cat Collar
Although my cat would rather play with the box these came in , your moggie might appreciate an Italian leather collar replete with hand-set stones.

Click here, il mio amico.
Cat paint-by-number set
While we wait for the world's first Paint-by-Numbers Museum of Modern Art here's something to help you explore your digital muse.

Click here for retentive fun.
Cat Toilet Trainer
The first time I ever heard about toilet-training a cat I said to myself "Surrrrre you can. And you can teach 'em to tap-dance, too."
Color me surprised.

Click here to look flushed.
Cat Nips cookbook
The thing that surprised me about this cook book for cats is that not every recipe begins with the phrase..."Take 1/2 cup shredded mouse brains...".

Click here to get cooking. BAM!
Cat On a Hot Tin Roof DVD
"STELLLLLAAAAAA!"



Click here for more Marlon.
Cat paint-by-number set
I fondly remember Gene Dietch as a producer of lousy, late-50's cartoons, but he was secretly a hip, groovy cat in the 40's and 50's.

Click here, you dig?
Cat Power CD
Purely in the interest of expanding your limited sphere of musical interest, and in getting you to fork over some hard-earned simoleons, I present Cat Power.

Click here to get down.
Cat Owner's home Veterinary Handbook
No joke. Every cat owner should own a copy of this book, "The Cat Owner's Home Veterinary Handbook".

Click here for health.
Really Fancy litter box
Now THIS is a litter box.

Click here to hide your shame.
Cat-Shaped Hole in My Heart CD
A guy lost his kitty to feline leukemia so he created a tribute album called "Cat-Shaped Hole in My Heart". I know how he feels. Proceeds go to a no-kill shelter.

Click here to share the pain.
Cat Women of the Moon
Sonny Tufts stars in  "Cat Women of the Moon". It's no "Species II" but, thankfully, very few other things are.

Click here for more Sonny Tufts.
Cat-Human anatomy book
I don't know why you'd write a book detailing the skeletal components of just the cat AND the human but it's good combo.

Click here for the inside skinny.
Cat Napper
Got a big cat, or even a little cat, and narrow window sills? Get a cat-hammock and let them enjoy the pleasures of what I call 'Kitty TV'.

Click here to improve the view.
The Cat Returns DVD
Hayao Miyazaki won an Oscar in 2002 for his animated film "Spirited Away" but he's no one-trick pony. Check out his delightful film of the Cat King.

Click here for regal splendour.
Cat shaped soap
What's better for the 'hidden dragon' of grime than the 'crouching kitten' of soap.

Click here to come clean.
Slantboard cat scraacher
The flat versions of these cardboard scratchboards are easy to use, but this one's uphill all the way.

Click here to improve your hang time.
Cat Socks
Carl Sandburg said "The fog comes on little cat feet".

Now so can you.

Click here to tickle your tootsies.
Calvin & Hobbes book
On September 15th, 2006, they released every single Calvin & Hobbes comic ever syndicated in this awesome three-book set.

Click here for heaven on paper.


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